As a mother, leaving your kids behind when you go on a trip is never easy. Your little ones constantly surface in your mind when you see something that they would love, or experience something you wish you had been able to share with them. Personally for me this is the hardest part, I want to share the world with them! I feel like every experience is worth more with my children beside me.
So many areas of motherhood are tinged with self inflicted guilt... Was I too hard on them about homework? I shouldn't have caved in and let them have that 2nd cookie? (ok, 3rd)... Are they going to remember when i lost my shizz and screamed at them like Mommie Dearest during bath time?
As mother's we find it way too easy to be too hard on ourselves about everything and taking a selfish trip away feels, well, selfish.
Funny enough one of the reasons we started Things We Heart is to acknowledge, in an open forum.... That being Selfish is O.K!
You our dear readers, are allowed to be selfish. We are allowed to be selfish. We all should be a little selfish, because guess what.... It makes us better mothers. We can't take care of everyone else if we never take care of ourselves.
Being a mother is hard, Hell, being a mother is non-stop 24-7 work that makes you tired to the bone and it NEVER stops.
Raising, guiding and teaching these amazing little creatures is the most harrowing experience most people will ever go through. No one knows what they are doing, we are all flying by the seat of our pants.
Some days are easy and perfect and golden and some days, you want to bury yourself under the covers, lock all the doors and binge-watch bad reality television while eating chocolate and weeping into your wine glass.
So please, be selfish! Have your significant other, your mother, your sister, your caretaker, your friend, your in-laws, any one you trust, take your amazing children for a night or two and go! Be selfish and indulge! Indulge in having seemingly endless time on your hands with no where to be and no immediate responsibilities to attend to. You don't have to go anywhere fancy. You can spend the night with a girlfriend at her place, you can send the kids to your parents and have the house all to yourself. Just get some time and relax.
We promise, when you come back together again with your children & your partner you will feel refreshed, energized and ready to be the best mom you can be. You may even learn something new about yourself.
I recently got the chance to get away for a little trip with two girlfriends. We went to the mountains and I was completely pushed outside of my usual comfort zone. For example, when we were skiing my friend encouraged me to do my first black diamond run. I had a mental block against doing this but with her light hearted encouragement, I ended up skiing those runs the whole trip.
Here is a picture of me after my first black diamond run... Look at that dorky smile! I am so proud of myself.
I would usually come in and snuggle up to watch movies after a long day of skiing, but my girlfriends were like "Let's go hiking!" So three hours of amazing wildreness later, we made it to the most beautiful waterfall. My husband was like, "What have you done with my wife?"
I came home and had so many fun stories to share with my boys about my fun adventures. I promised to take them along with me next time. In just a few days I grew as a person and connected with wonderful and inspiring women. I feel great. Our whole family needed that little break. I am encouraging my husband to take one too, he needs to be selfish too!
It seems important that children grow up knowing that their parents are autonomous people with lives of their own. Then maybe the realization that Mom & Dad are actually flawed and real humans won't hit them so hard later in life. Alright honestly, that moment is always shocking for everyone. "Wait, you're not just on this planet to take care of my wants & needs? Oh."
Another good aspect of getting away is that every one will be REALLY happy to see you come home. You will definitely hear how appreciated you are and thats really nice. Go out and get some time to your self and let us know how it goes!
XOXO- Things We Heart
P.S- You can also have your significant other head this if they need a little help understanding your need to hit the road.